Once Upon A Time
by Egaads
Summary: Once upon a time, in a land far far away, two knights named Sir Harry Potter and Sir Cedric Diggory set out to win the hand of the beautiful, but really really annoying Princess Cho Chang! But they must overcome a few obstacles... R&R please!
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Harry Potter does not belong to me!

* * *

Chapter 1 

Once upon a time, in a land far far away, there lived a lovely princess named Cho Chang. Princess Cho Chang lived in a beautiful castle surrounded by majestic gardens and whatnot. She was also super rich because she was a princess. However, even though she lived in such a lovely environment, Princess Cho was NOT happy. In fact, Princess Cho was lonely and sad. Her parents, the King and Queen, had died long ago, and as she was the heir to the throne, she was supposed to be queen. Unfortunately, her throne had been snatched away by the power hungry Lord Voldemort, and she was locked away in a tower located in some remote area of the massive castle.

xx

One beautiful day, Princess Cho was alone in her desolate tower and singing. Suddenly, she heard a manly voice!

"What is that lovely singing voice?" exclaimed the manly voice. "It has led me to this deserted tower that is located in the middle of a large, echoing castle! What strange bird has such an alluring song?"

"Er…" came another manly voice, but less manly than the first, "Maybe it's a phoenix?"

"A phoenix does not have a voice as enchanting as the one we heard," cried the first manly voice. Princess Cho traipsed to the window in her tower and peered out. She looked out and saw TWO men riding brooms! And they were super handsome! Actually, only one of them was. The other was kind of scrawny!

"Ah!" uttered the handsome one, "'Twas a lovely damsel who gave voice to that haunting melody!"

"Er…hello…" mumbled the scrawny one, who was blushing furiously when he saw her staring at him. Princess Cho thought he was kind of cute, even if he looked more like a boy than a man. He had nice green eyes.

"Beautiful maiden," cried the handsome man, "I am Sir Cedric! Might I have the honor of knowing your name?" Princess Cho looked at Sir Cedric. How beauteous mankind was! Her face reddened and she looked shyly down at her hands.

"Sir Cedric, my name is Princess Cho Chang," she replied demurely.

"'Tis a charming name to match your charming visage!" yelled back Sir Cedric.

"I'm Sir Harry," mumbled the skinny, less handsome one. No one really cared though.

"Oh Sir Cedric," cried Princess Cho forlornly, "I beg you, aid me in my terrible plight!"

"Fair lady, what is it that you wish me to do?" inquired the one addressed.

"I've been shut away in this secluded castle by the evil Lord Voldemort, the villain who usurped my throne!"

"Lord Voldemort!" yelled Sir Harry in surprise, "I was just coming here with Sir Cedric to kill him because he brutally slaughtered my parents! Except we got side tracked by you." Once again, no one really cared.

"I shall rescue you from you companionless predicament!" declared Sir Cedric. "Fair lady, I shall ask Lord Voldemort to release you from captivity by asking for your hand in marriage!"

_Whoa he's fast,_ thought Sir Harry. Before he knew what he was doing, he had opened his mouth as well.

"Er… Princess… Will you marry ME?" The words were out of his mouth, and he gaped at himself in surprise. Sir Cedric and Princess Cho gawked at him, the outsider. The had forgotten that this LOSER was there!

"Er…" said Princess Cho awkwardly, "Sir Cedric just asked me that same question…"

"That's alright Princess!" proclaimed Sir Cedric. "We'll BOTH go to Lord Voldemort and ask for your hand in marriage! Let's see who gets it!" He flashed a dazzling grin at Princess Cho, who flushed rosily. She felt like swooning.

"Oh thank you sir knight!" she cried. She directed her thanks at Sir Cedric and ignored Sir Harry completely. She didn't even know she was ignoring him. He was an ignoramus! Sir Harry scowled darkly. He'd show Cedric!

The two knights turned and rode off toward the main castle on their trusty brooms. They both had forgotten about their quest to slaughter Lord Voldemort.

xx

Lord Voldemort was in a foul, nasty mood. His spies, the Death Eaters, STILL could not find the Order of the Pheonix, the rebels who were trying to overthrow him! He suspected that Lord Dumbledore, who presided over the castle Hogwarts, was the leader of the rebels. However, he could do nothing against Lord Dumbledore. He secretly feared him, and remembered all those traumatizing moments in his childhood when his evil little schemes had run afoul of Dumbledore, and how he had been punished. Lord Dumbledore had never really hurt him, it was just his exceeding niceness that had damaged his youthful innocence. All he had done was invite him into his castle with some sweetmeats that weren't sour and bitter enough for Voldemort's taste.

A timid messenger crawled up to Lord Voldemort, who was sitting in his un-rightful throne, and kneeled down before him. Then he kissed the dusty ground before the evil king.

"What do you want, worm?" hissed Lord Voldemort. His red eyes flashed dangerously at his groveling subject.

"Y-your m-ma-jesty," stuttered the quivering lowlife, "There are two knights outside who wish to meet you."

"Fine!" snarled Lord Voldemort, "Bring them in! And CRUCIO!" Lord Voldemort tortured the messenger out of pure spite. Everyone else in the court backed away nervously, as the un-rightful king cackled madly at the writhing form before him. "Bring them in you foul insect! Bring them in I say!" shrieked Lord Voldemort. The messenger was still under influence of the Crucio spell, but Lord Voldemort did not care. The unfortunate man crawled in agony toward the front entrance of the castle to tell the knights to enter, but he had to move very slowly. He was screeching in pain at the same time, but if he valued his life, it was best to obey Lord Voldemort. Lord Voldemort decided to have a bit of mercy and took off the spell. He could continue later.

Shortly afterward, two knights walked into the hall, holding their broomsticks over their shoulder. One was unbelievably gorgeous, while the other one was small and mean looking in comparison. They kneeled before Lord Voldemort.

"What do you want?" sneered Lord Voldemort in a dangerously silky tone of voice.

"We wanted to ask for Princess Cho's hand in marriage," replied Cedric calmly. Harry just nodded, at a loss for words. Lord Voldemort sure was intimidating! And he was sooo ugly! He reminded Harry of a humongous snake, in all his slit-like red eyes and nose-less glory. Plus, he wore these tight black robes!Ew!Harry looked at Lord Voldemort's hands, which were tapping the gilded chair impatiently. His fingers were long and spidery, and his skin was an unhealthy white pallour.

_Geez_ thought Harry, _this bloke is UGLY!_

"Hm…" thought Lord Voldemort aloud, "What if I said no?" He smiled in a very serpentine and sadistic way.

"Then I shall battle you for it!" announced Sir Cedric.

"Dear, dear," mused Lord Voldemort sinsterly, "Then I'll probably have to allow you to marry her don't I?"

"Yes, Your Majesty," assented Sir Cedric.

"But I'm going to say NO!" Lord Voldemort cackled maliciously. "Why don't you fight me for it?" He drew his wand and pointed it at Cedric, who pulled out his own as well.

"No! Stop!" yelled Sir Harry, drawing notice to himself for the first time. He stood up, and Lord Voldemort stared at him. Then he noticed the scar on Sir Harry's forehead and started in surprise, even though his face did not show it.

Now, a long time ago, a prophecy was made to Lord Voldemort that a man with a scar on his head would be able to meet him as his equal. Lord Voldemort had then proclaimed that any infant with a scar on its head would have to be killed instantly, except no infants were killed because infants were not born with scars on their heads. They still aren't.

Lord Voldemort decided to test Sir Harry's strength.

"Crucio!" he shrieked. A beam of light shot from his wand and hit Sir Harry. Sir Harry doubled up and began to roll on the ground in terrible pain.

_Weak,_ though Lord Voldemort scornfully. _He doesn't pose a threat to me at all because he obviously isn't my equal. _Lord Voldemort withdrew the spell and decided to have some fun with the two knights.

"I'll let you have the princess' hand in marriage, but only if you accomplish three tasks for me! Whichever one of you two wins will get the princess' hand!" said the Dark Lord. He smirked wickedly to himself. The tasks would be next to impossible!

"Fine! I accept!" cried Sir Cedric courageously. Not to be outdone, Sir Henry accepted as well.

"Wonderful," smirked Lord Voldemort, "However, if you lose, you must die! Do you still wish to continue? This means that only one of you will escape the tournament alive and marry the princess. The loser will be killed!" Harry gulped and wondered whether he should withdraw and just let Cedric win.

"For the love of the Princess Cho, whose beauty surpasses that of anyone else in the country, or the world for that matter, I refuse to back out!" shouted Sir Cedric. Harry looked down at his feet, ashamed at his cowardly thoughts.

"I won't back out either," he mumbled.

"Excellent," murmured Lord Voldemort ominously. "Then let us begin!"

"What's our first task?" asked Sir Cedric.

"Hm…" contemplated the Dark Lord, "Oh yes… this will be an enjoyable one indeed…"

"W-what?" squeaked Sir Harry. He did NOT like the foreboding grin on the fake king's face. Harry wished he had backed out when he had the chance.

"Each of you must bring back a golden egg from the fearsome Hungarian Horntail!" cackled Lord Voldemort in a high-pitched voice.

"What?" yelped Harry, "No one in the whole history of the entire world has ever done that before!"

"I'll do it!" said Sir Cedric. Harry sighed. He just could not measure up to Sir Cedric! But he loved the beautiful Princess Cho as well. He knew in his heart that he would regret it for the rest of his life that he did not grasp this opportunity. He would impress the raven-haired princess, with her dark shining eyes that reflected like mirrors. Harry summoned up his courage, and fixed the image of her smiling at him in his mind. HE CAN DO IT!

And so, Sir Cedric and Sir Harry rode out into the sunset on their trusty brooms, thus starting their epic quest to win the hand of the lovely Princess Cho Chang!

To Be Continued…

* * *

:) Please review! Thank you! 


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

"Sir Cedric," started Sir Harry uncertainly. He was slightly intimidated by the greatness that was Sir Cedric. "Do you have any idea where to find a Hungarian Horntail?"

"I'd say Hungary," replied Sir Cedric in a very dashing voice because he was a very dashing man, even though his answer was obvious and insipid.

"I don't think so," frowned Sir Harry, "The dragon only exists in myths and legends! I'm sure it can't be found in a place so ordinary!"

"I shall check out Hungary beforehand anyway," nodded Sir Cedric firmly. The wind blew his silky hair about, and the setting sun set off his noble profile becomingly so that he looked absolutely princely.

_He'll probably look really good next to Princess Cho,_ thought Sir Harry ruefully.

"I'm going to do some research first," declared Sir Harry courageously, trying to be dashing like Sir Cedric. He even struck a small pose so that the setting sun could set off his profile becomingly too. Unfortunately, his heroic stance and voice were wasted.

"That's nice," muttered Sir Cedric, not really listening. He swung himself onto his broom, and zoomed away, eager to get a head start on the quest. Poor, pathetic Harry was left coughing in the clouds of dust billowing charmingly after Cedric. Sir Harry was a little perturbed by this, but he let it go. He'd show pretty boy Cedric and the beautiful Princess Cho how great he could be!

Sir Harry decided to start gathering information with a woman named Lady Hermione. She was the most knowledgeable person he knew, and an excellent sorceress to boot.

"Come, my trusty broom, let us begin on our journey," muttered Harry to his faithful besom, Firebolt. Harry zoomed off into the darkness as well.

:x:

It was midnight when Sir Harry finally reached Lady Hermione's abode. She lived in a modest castle on the banks of a large and rushing river. Sir Harry banged loudly on the castle doors.

"Who is it to call so late at night?" came a familiar voice from behind the door.

"Ron?" gasped Harry, surprised, "It's me! Harry! What are you doing in Hermione's home?"

"So you say you are Sir Harry," shouted the voice from inside, "Prove it!" Harry sighed.

"Just open up Ron!" screamed Harry impatiently. The door slowly creaked open. A long nose stuck out, and two eyes peered out at Harry from under a shock of scarlet hair.

"Hey mate," greeted Ron cheerfully. Harry looked at his gangly red haired friend and grinned.

"What's with all the security?" asked Harry. Ron lowered his voice.

"I'll tell you about it later. Get inside first." Harry entered the castle, and the door shut behind him with a tremendous groan, which echoed spookily down the deserted corridors. Sir Harry always marveled how Lady Hermione could live alone in such a creepy, lonely place, but she had refused the company of house elves. According to her, house elves were "slave labor" and she disapproved of Harry and Ron, who both had house elves working in their castles. Sir Harry followed Sir Ron through the corridors of Lady Hermione's castle until they reached a lovely little room with a nice bright fire burning.

"Hey Hermione!" grinned Harry at the bushy-haired woman sitting next to the flickering fire. She appeared to be obsessively knitting a purple woolly bladder, and did not even look up as Harry entered the room.

"Harry! You're back," muttered Hermione, her eyes still fixed on her horrendous knitting. Harry noticed a large pile of some finished woolly bladders in various colors sitting next to her, and wondered what she was up to now.

"So," began Harry, "Care to tell me why Ron's here? What's going on?"

"Well Harry," answered Ron, "You may have heard that not many people are pleased with His Majesty, He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, these days. Secret organizations have been formed to oppose him."

"Oh yes! Harry!" spoke up Hermione from her seat, "Didn't you vow to avenge your parents' deaths and kill You-Know-Who? What became of that quest?" Ron glanced at Hermione with an annoyed expression on his face for being interrupted.

"Oh, I forgot about that one. I have a different quest now, that's why I'm here," replied Harry.

"ANYWAY," continued Ron loudly, "Hermione and I have joined the Order of the Phoenix, a rebel group dedicated to the overthrowing of Lord Voldemort! And the Order has decided to allow you to join as well!"

"What's your quest?" inquired Hermione, still on a separate topic.

"I'm looking for a Hungarian Horntail so I can steal a golden egg!" responded Harry.

"Do you want to join or not?" demanded Ron loudly.

"Hungarian Horntail! But that's dangerous! Not to mention completely impossible!" cried Hermione, horrified. She finally tore her eyes away from her knitting, and looked up at Harry anxiously.

"You really should join. The Dark Lord has killed too many innocents these days," said Ron, ignoring Hermione.

"Where are you going to look for one? They only exist in legends!"

"Er…" wavered Harry, "I'll be happy to join the Order of the Phoenix. And I was hoping you knew that, Hermione."

"Excellent mate!" exclaimed Ron.

"Let me check my library," muttered Hermione. She put down the woolly bladder and stood up, and then headed out of the room. Ron and Harry followed as well. As they walked down the deserted corridors with their footsteps resounding in the emptiness, Ron and Hermione began to question Harry about his recent adventures.

"How'd you get tied up with this new quest? Why'd you drop the old one? Killing You-Know-Who sure would have been useful for the Order of the Phoenix," interrogated Ron.

"Well, me and Cedric—" started Harry.

"Cedric and _I_," corrected Hermione, as if she were Harry's mother.

"Well, Cedric and _I_ were riding toward Voldemort's (Ron and Hermione flinched at the name) castle to kill Voldemort (another flinch) when we heard a—"

"You mean you just decided to walk straight up to the Dark Lord and kill him without any plan whatsoever?" interrupted Hermione, shocked. She could not comprehend the stupidity of people with XY chromosomes sometimes. Ron growled in annoyance.

"Shush! Let Harry continue!"

"ANYWAY," continued Harry, "We heard someone singing so we decided to investigate. Turns out, it was just some princess locked up in a tower in the castle who was making that sound, so well… er… I… well…" stammered Harry. Hermione rolled her eyes knowingly at him.

"Let me guess," snorted Lady Hermione in a very unladylike manner, "You and Cedric asked her for her hand in marriage."

"No way!" guffawed Ron, "Harry wouldn't do something stupid like that!" He choked with laughter at the thought. Hermione glared at Ron.

"Er… well… I… er…" stuttered Harry. Ron looked at him with eyes as round as saucers. He gaped like a chainsaw wound. Harry could almost peer down his throat and into his stomach.

"You don't mean…!" yelped Ron in surprise. He clutched his heart dramatically, and pretended to have a seizure.

"Typical," muttered Hermione. She snorted again, and sounded very much like a donkey with bogies.

"Well I did," sighed Harry, despondent and embarrassed. He could feel a flushing rising at an alarming rate from his toes to his scalp.

"What's her name? Is she pretty?" grinned Ron teasingly. "Nice figure?" Hermione scowled furiously at him.

"And then what happened?" demanded Hermione impatiently, still fuming at Ron for no reason whatsoever.

"Well me and Cedric—"

"Cedric and _I_."

"Cedric and I decide to go see Voldemort (flinch) to ask for her hand in, uh, m- marriage." The m-word was hard to spit out. Harry could not imagine himself as a married man, with children and having to support a family. He was beginning to regret his rash decision, and he could not really picture Princess Cho that clearly in his mind anymore. He had only seen her for about five minutes, and all he remembered was that she had black hair, shining dark eyes, and a lovely voice. _I should have thought a little more about asking someone for her hand in marriage! Marriage! I've never even contemplated the idea!_ thought Harry a little sadly.

"So let me get this straight," groaned Ron, "Instead of killing You-Know-Who, you go up to him and ask him for the hand in marriage of some girl you only just met?"

"Well, yeah," mumbled Harry a little sheepishly. It sure sounded unbelievably foolish when Ron phrased it like that. Come to think of it, he didn't even know Princess Cho Chang's likes or dislikes, and whether she was a timid, obedient woman, or a loud-mouthed, brash virago.

"So what does this have to do with the quest?" asked Hermione.

"Voldemort (flinch) decided to give us three tasks, and whoever completes them will win her hand in marriage. The loser will be sentenced to death," explained Harry, who once again realized how idiotic he was. For Merlin's sake, his life was at stake for a woman with whom he had barely exchanged two words!

"So now your quest is to look for some dragon that went extinct hundreds of years ago, and to get a golden egg from it?" needled Hermione dryly.

"Yeah," sighed Harry miserably.

"How about you just go up to You-Know-Who, kill him, take the girl, and forget about this quest?" suggested Ron.

"I already gave Voldemort my word of honor," muttered Harry. His main reason, however, was that he wanted to show Cedric and Princess Cho that he wasn't as pathetic as he looked. If he backed out now, well, he'd never be able to look Cedric or Princess Cho, in the eye again. It would be too shameful.

"Okay, well here's the library," announced Lady Hermione, "I can probably find some information on the Hungarian Horntail. But I haven't really updated my library in a while, so there might not be much."

:x:

A few hours later…

There really wasn't much. In fact, there wasn't ANYTHING! There was nothing at all! Hermione looked a bit put out.

"My library has never failed me before!" she moaned. Her lips were pouting slightly. It seemed to be a personal insult to her that her beloved library had not provided any knowledge on the Hungarian Horntail's whereabouts.

"That's alright," sighed Harry through red-rimmed eyes. The best they could find was useless information on how NOT to meet a Hungarian Horntail, and they were trying to do the opposite. In addition, the writing in all of the books he had looked through had microscopic script. No wonder Lady Hermione's hair was so bushy! The miniscule font of the texts must have frazzled her eyes and caused her hair to grow like that!

"There must be another way!" grumbled Ron sourly. He wasn't the bookish type. Suddenly, his face lit up. "I know! Let's go consult an oracle!"

"That is the stupidest idea that I have ever heard!" scowled Hermione, "Everyone knows that they're all a bunch of old frauds!"

"Oooo, Don't say that," warned Ron, "They're could be watching us right now with their crystal balls, and they probably have the power to doom you to a life of tragedy and despair!"

"That's ridiculous!" exclaimed Hermione disdainfully.

"Let's just try it out," exhaled Harry wearily. He was sooo tired that he was willing to try ANYTHING.

"Tomorrow," muttered Ron, slumping back into his chair. His head fell onto a dusty old tome with a thunk, and he was soon snoring away.

"It is tomorrow," groaned Hermione, "We've been up the whole night! The sun's rising!"

"In the afternoon then," gurgled Ron through a puddle of spit. The other two fell asleep in their chairs as well, as they were absolutely jaded from a night of continuous research. The slept soundly.

:x:

After Ron, Hermione, and Harry had awoken and had some lunch, they decided to go see the oracle.

"I heard from Sir Neville Longbottom that there is a fairly accurate Seer living in a forest near Hogwarts castle," remarked Ron helpfully, "But of course, Sir Neville is quite gullible and would believe anything."

"We might as well give it a try," said Harry. He was beginning to feel a bit apprehensive about his quest, and the second and third tasks seemed such a long way off. He did not really believe that he would ever fight a Hungarian Horntail.

"She's probably an old fraud. Sir Neville is too easily intimidated, so he isn't exactly a reliable source," snorted Hermione.

"I think her name is Madame Trelewney," continued Ron, ignoring Hermione, "And Lady Lavender and Lady Parvati consult her often. She seems to have quite a reputation. Did you know she's descended from that famous seer, Cassandra?"

"At least she _sounds_ qualified," remarked Hermione. "But Lavender and Parvati are silly girls. I don't exactly trust their judgment!"

"Let's go," commanded Harry. The trio swung onto their brooms and kicked off.

:x:

"I think this place is it," whispered Ron, as he, Hermione, and Harry landed in front of the oracle's frightful abode. The place was really scary! It was a dark, ominous cave located in the middle of an equally dark, ominous forest, and the place smelled like too much perfume. A mysterious heat radiated from the gaping mouth of the cavern.

"Suddenly, I feel hot," muttered Hermione.

"I'm feeling really sleepy," mumbled Harry drowsily.

"It's a spell…" murmured Ron incoherently. All three of their eyelids began to droop, and they had to stagger to stay upright. They gazed through filmy eyes into the artificial night of the grotto. Suddenly, two gleaming green orbs became apparent in the darkness. Harry's disillusioned mind managed to recognize them as eyes. Then, his senses snapped awake when he realized that it was a MASSIVE GRASSHOPPER EXITING THE CAVE!

No wait—it was a skinny, homely woman covered in gaudy jewelry and draped in an excessive amount of scarves. Her huge glasses looked like insect eyes, and her bony face had a praying mantis-like quality to it.

"I've been expecting you," breathed the bug-woman mystically.

"Exshpeshing ush?" gibbered Ron. He looked like he had fallen asleep standing up, and to Harry's disgust, he could detect a sliver of spit hanging from Ron's half-open mouth.

"Madame Trelewney I suppose?" stated Hermione in a hushed voice. Her senses seemed to be the most alert of the three.

"Yes," exhaled the mystic ethereally, "The Inner Eye has alerted me of your arrival. Please, do come in." With a very slight jangling of jewelry, the psychic turned around and reentered the darkness. Ron, Harry, and Hermione followed.

The skinny bug-lady led them through a tunnel connected to a cavern. This seemed to be her living quarters. Ron, Harry, and Hermione were extremely shocked when they saw what was inside. It looked like an incongruous little antique teashop! Funny finding a place like that here! There were cushions in garish colors scattered about, and a few armchairs sported limp old doilies. A multi-colored fire burned brightly on one side of the room, and it emitted the sickly-sweet smell that they had detected earlier. It was the source of their sleepiness. Their minds were still a bit clouded, and they could not think too clearly. Madame Trelewney seated herself beside a frilly hot pink table, and peered into the crystal ball sitting upon it.

Harry, Ron, and Hermione watched in awe as she began to wave her arms mysteriously over the glass sphere. She muttered strange words that sounded like incantations, and her eyes suddenly gleamed with comprehension. The three friends held their breaths in anticipation as she looked up with a very unfathomable expression on her skinny face.

"Ah…" whispered insect woman, "I see… I see…that the purpose of your coming here…you wish to know… to know your future!" Hermione and Harry stared at her in disbelief, while Ron appeared amazed.

"That's a given," snorted Hermione contemptuously. Trelewney turned and scowled at Hermione. She seemed to take an instant disliking toward the girl. She clutched her scarves tighter around her shriveled body and glared beadily at Hermione, while shaking with anger.

"You! Girl with the bushy hair!" shot Trelewney rudely at Hermione, and losing the other worldly quality in her voice, "By peering through the mists of time, my Inner Eye can detect that you will die brutally under the scum of a giant rampaging flobberworm!" Hermione seemed unfazed by this distressing forecast, however. She rolled her eyes.

"That's completely preposterous! Obviously, this woman is a charlatan! Let's go now!"

"No wait!" gasped Ron, "I think this woman has been pretty accurate so far!"

"She's only made about, two predictions! Do you seriously believe the second prediction will EVER happen?" demanded Hermione in anger.

"Well, you never know," replied Ron cryptically. "Just the other night, I had a dream that you and Harry turned into a bowl of cereal, and a talking carrot came and gobbled you two up!"

"What does that have to do with this?" snarled Hermione in exasperation.

"This boy appears to have the Inner Eye as well," cut in Madame Trelewney mystically. "Often, flashes of foresight grace the most unlikely vessels, and offer a brief, clarifying glimpse into the future."

"Tell me," continued bug woman huskily, "What else have you seen boy?" Ron complied and launched into an enthusiastic account of his bizarre dream the night before, involving a tap-dancing hippogriff and a toenail disguised as a stage. Madame Trelewney nodded in approval at the clairvoyant boy, and listened intently. Hermione rolled her eyes angrily, and stomped irritably out of the cave. Boys could be sooooooo idiotic sometimes!

"Anyway," interrupted Harry after Ron had finished his vivid retelling of his dreams, "We've come to ask you if you might know where the Hungarian Horntail resides."

"Hungarian Horntail?" gasped the oracle in horror, "That dragon exists only in myths and legends!"

_We already know that, _thought Harry privately. _This woman really is an old fraud!_

"Well, we think that one may exist somewhere in the world and we're seeking it out," explained Harry. "We were hoping that you might able to find out where it is with your Inner Eye."

"Let me try," muttered Madame Trelewney, peering intently into the crystal ball. She waved her hands and swayed her body theatrically. "Ahhh…" she hissed softly, and her eyes filled with tears as she looked up at Harry. "There… I see your future…it is not a happy one…"

"What is it?" questioned Harry warily.

"An angry Hungarian Horntail will crush you under one of its foul claws and dismember you limb by limb!" cried the psychic, "And as for your red headed friend here…" Trelewney turned her gaze on Ron, who flinched. "He will escape unscathed and live to be one hundred years old and have twenty children who will all become kings and queens!"

"Wow!" gasped Ron in delight, "Can you tell me more?" Harry groaned in distress. Time was running out! For all he knew, Cedric could probably be returning with a golden egg already. He had to hurry!

In the end, Harry had to forcefully drag Ron out of the cave. They met up with Hermione, who was waiting outside.

"Did she tell you anything important?" asked Hermione sarcastically.

"No…" said Harry.

"Yes!" said Ron at the same time.

"I don't want to know," muttered Hermione, turning away. "Anyway, any other ideas Harry?"

"No…" replied Harry yet again. "If only there was someone who knew every animal in the world, especially large, dangerous, fearsome creatures, and could tell us where the Hungarian Horntail is!"

The three friends stared at each other as the same thought crossed their minds.

"HAGRID!"

To Be Continued...

* * *

I hope you all enjoyed my story so far! Please review! I really appreciate it:)


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

A lone hut sat on the edge of the forest. Suddenly, three figures descended from the sky and landed in front of the rustic house. The small dwelling erupted in barks.

"It's been a while since I've visited Hagrid!" grinned Harry, "I can hear Fang barking!"

"Shut yer barkin' Fang," came a deep voice from inside the hut. "It's probably jest some squirrels." The door opened.

"Hey Hagrid!" chorused the trio. The gigantic man framed by the doorway beamed through his tangled brown beard.

"Oh it's you three," he growled gruffly. "Long time no see." His equally gigantic dog, Fang, bounded out from behind Hagrid and bowled Harry to the ground.

"Geroff me Fang!" groaned Harry as Fang licked his face. Harry had forgotten how nasty dog slobber was.

"Come on in you three," grunted Hagrid, motioning them into his very humble abode. The three humans and the dog followed Hagrid into the hut.

Hagrid busied himself preparing tea and his infamous rock cakes. He placed the platter of cakes and the teapot on the table, and then poured four cups of tea.

"How have you been Hagrid?" asked Harry from over the rim of his cup.

"Fine, fine," grunted Hagrid as he sat down at the table as well. "What 'ave you three been up to?""

"Harry has a new quest!" spoke up Hermione from her seat.

"He's going to get married," sniggered Ron. Harry shot him a glare as Hagrid jolted in surprise.

"Yer a bit young ter git married!" exclaimed Hagrid. "Who's the lucky girl?"

"She's a princess," muttered Harry, "And I'm up against Sir Cedric Diggory to get her. Whoever completes the quest can marry her."

"I dunno 'arry," said Hagrid seriously, "Sounds pretty risky ter me."

"Well yeah, but I already promised Voldemort," grumbled Harry. He stared grumpily into his tea. Hagrid flinched so hard that he upset his cup and kicked the table. Hagrid and Hermione's cup fell from the table and shattered. Hermione repaired them instantly with her wand.

"YOU-KNOW-WHO?" bellowed Hagrid, "WHAT'S GOTTEN INTO YER, 'ARRY?"

"It seems Harry was swayed by Princess Cho's beauty," snorted Hermione dryly.

"Yeah but—" began Hagrid, who had calmed down.

"I know, I know," grumbled Harry, "It was stupid me okay? But I dunno what got into me. I just did it."

"What's yer quest 'arry?" questioned Hagrid.

"Oh that reminds me!" piped up Hermione, "We were going to ask you about Harry's first task!"

"I have to get a golden egg from a Hungarian Horntail," stated Harry in reply to Hagrid's question.

"'ungarian 'orntail!" breathed Hagrid in awe, "I've always wanted ter get one myself!"

"We were hoping you knew where it is," put in Ron.

"If an'one shou' know, it'd be you Ron!" admonished Hagrid, "Your older brother Charlie 'as the last 'orntail in captivity!"

"Seriously?" cried Ron, "I never knew that!" Hermione rolled her eyes at him.

"Well you three better git goin'," grumbled Hagrid, "You dun wan' Diggory gettin' there firs'."

"Thanks Hagrid!" grinned Harry. He got up and headed to the door. Ron and Hermione followed.

"No problem 'arry!" beamed Hagrid. As Harry, Ron, and Hermione mounted their brooms to prepare for take off, Hagrid sidled up to Harry and glanced around the clearing furtively.

"If you dun mind 'arry," whispered Hagrid into Harry's ear, "Can you git me one of them 'ungarian 'orntail eggs? I've always fancied an 'ungarian 'orntail myself."

"Er…sure Hagrid," answered Harry, though he wasn't really going to. He remembered when he was young and had visited Hagrid's hut one time. Hagrid had traumatized him when he had insisted Harry to meet his new friend, a giant spider named Aragog. Aragog had tried to eat him! Since then, Harry had always been wary of Hagrid's new "friends".

"Hagrid!" yelled Hermione reprovingly, "You know it's illegal to breed dragons unless you're licensed and educated at one of those schools on dragon training!"

"It won' hurt anyone," said Hagrid with a careless wave of his hand, "They're cute lil' critters!" Harry, Ron, and Hermione stared at him disbelievingly. Then they shrugged their shoulders simultaneously. Hagrid was Hagrid!

"Bye Hagrid!" called Harry, Ron, and Hermione as they took off into the clear blue sky. Hagrid waved at them until they looked like little specks in the distance. He was extremely cheered by their visit, and hoped to own a dragon egg soon.

"I really don't believe that guy," groaned Ron, "If you heard him, you'd think he was talking about a little bunny or something!"

"Hagrid's been like that as long as I could remember," sighed Harry. "Remember when he took us to see Aragog?"

"Yeah," assented Ron with a shudder, "I've never been the same ever since!"

"Ron," demanded Hermione, "How could you not know that Charlie has a Hungarian Horntail? I mean, those dragons are legendary!"

"I dunno," shrugged Ron. Hermione sighed. They lapsed into silence and continue to fly. Finally, they could see Ron's home down below.

"Oh look! There's the castle Burrow!" shouted Harry over the rushing wind. Harry could see Ron's castle, with the funny crooked towers and the wild garden. They landed in front of the door. Ron knocked loudly.

"I'm home!" hollered Ron. The door flew open, and Lady Weasley bustled out.

"Oh Ron!" cried Lady Molly, "I was so worried about you! You were gone the entire night! I thought something terrible had happened!"

"Don't worry mum!" replied Ron, "You have that clock!"

"Yes but it's been pointing to 'mortal danger' ever since we joined Th—" Lady Molly lowered her voice significantly, "Ever since we joined the Order! Now hurry up and come in!"

"Is Charlie home?" asked Ron.

"Yes! He just got in a while ago," replied Lady Molly. They walked down the corridor of the castle and reached a large open space containing a huge table. A muscled man with a burn mark on his shoulder sat at the table.

"Hey Charlie!" chorused Ron, Harry, and Hermione.

"Hey!" greeted Charlie in a friendly manner. "How's everything going?"

"Fine, fine," muttered Ron. "We're sort of in a hurry. Where are you keeping your Hungarian Horntail?"

"Can't you say a proper hello?" groaned Charlie, "The minute I get home, you're already demanding things from me!" He grinned.

"It's for Harry's quest!" retorted Ron. Then he smirked very evilly. "Harry's getting MARRIED!" Harry glared venomously at Ron. He felt like strangling the rotten little—

"MARRIED!" screamed Lady Weasley joyfully.

"MARRIED?" gaped Charlie disbelievingly. He stared at Harry in astonishment, and then his face relaxed into a huge grin. "I never would have thought!" chuckled Charlie, slapping Harry on the back. Harry's spectacles nearly flew off from the strength of Charlie's thumps. There was power in those arms! Enough to tame a Hungarian Horntail at least.

"Oh Harry!" sobbed Lady Weasley rapturously. She squished Harry against her plump body in a tight embrace. "I'm so happy for you!"

"Who's the lucky lady?" asked Charlie. He could not seem to stop smiling or pummeling Harry's back. Between Lady Weasley's cuddling and Charlie's pounding, Harry could not get a word in edge wise.

"She's a princess," replied Ron with a smirk.

"Oh a princess?" gasped Lady Weasley, "Oh Harry!" She appeared speechless at Harry's good fortune, and clutched him tighter to her chest instead. Harry found himself suffocating in Lady Weasley's sizable bosom.

"When can we meet her?" inquired Charlie enthusiastically. Lady Weasley finally let go of Harry. She stared at him eagerly with her hands clasped before her. Hermione cleared her throat.

"Actually Lady Weasley," began Hermione, "Harry may not get married at all."

The hopeful expression on Lady Weasley's face wavered a bit.

"Why ever not?" she questioned with wide eyes.

"Well, he has to complete three nearly impossible ordeals in order to win the hand of the princess," responded Hermione, "And his first task is to get a golden egg from the Hungarian Horntail. That's why we were hoping to see you, Charlie."

"Yeah, and we need to be quick about it or else Sir Cedric Diggory will get there first," added Ron.

Charlie scratched his head thoughtfully.

"Er…" said Charlie, "You might have a tough job getting an egg. Lately, the dragon's been a bit unruly. I had to summon a couple of my friends over in order keep it under control. I don't think it'll be possible getting a golden egg from her. She's already mad enough!"

"Well I must!" cried Harry determinedly. "Where are you keeping her?"

"In an enclosure a couple leagues north of here. I'll take you there tomorrow. It's late. We should be going to bed," answered Charlie. Suddenly, Harry felt very, very tired. He could tell that Ron and Hermione were exhausted as well, so he followed Lady Weasley as she led him to his room.

:x:

The next morning, Sir Harry Potter, Sir Ron Weasley, and Lady Hermione Granger woke up bright and early to get a head start on what promised to be a lovely, sunny day. The descended down the crooked stone stairways of Burrow Castle to the dining area. Breakfast was laid out, and Sir Charlie was already sitting at the table munching on a slice of bread and cheese.

"Awake already, eh Harry?" grinned Charlie from his seat. Lady Weasley was bustling about making sure Harry, Ron, and Hermione had enough food.

"Thanks, but I'm fine," said Harry for the third time when Lady Weasley offered him yet another loaf of bread.

Finally, everyone finished their breakfast, and Harry, Ron, and Hermione followed Charlie out to the broom shed to saddle up their brooms and prepare for the journey.

As they were about to launch, Lady Weasley hurried out of the castle and thrust a large basket into Harry's arms. Harry peered inside to see a whole roast chicken, a flagon of pumpkin juice, and a large loaf of bread and some cheese.

"For the journey," explained Lady Weasley tearfully as she bade goodbye to the quartet. Charlie rolled his eyes.

"Don't worry mum," groaned Charlie, "If all goes well we should be back by nightfall."

"But I can't help it!" sobbed Lady Weasley, "Everyone seems to be leaving me! With your father gone doing who-knows what for the Order and Percy gone working for Lord Crouch and Bill gone treasure-hunting and Ginny being chased by suitors, I don't know what to do!"

"Don't worry mum! We always come back!" soothed Charlie.

"We have to go now," reminded Ron.

"We'll be fine Lady Weasley!" assured Harry.

"I'll be watching them for you," promised Hermione.

"Goodbye!" cried Lady Weasley after them as they flew into the wide, blue sky, "Good bye!"

:x:

The quartet flew for about an hour, until they reached their destination. They landed beside a large stone enclosure, almost like an open stadium, where Charlie kept the Hungarian Horntail in captivity. The wilderness surrounding them was eerily quiet.

"The dragon usually naps at this time of the day," whispered Charlie, "So right now would probably be the best time for you to sneak in and grab the egg. You should keep your wand ready though, because she's a light sleeper."

"Sure," said Harry nervously, "Do you know anything that'll work against a giant, rampaging and probably furious dragon?"

"Nope, sorry, but try to aim your spells at the eyes; those are its weak points," answered Charlie. He slapped Harry on the back. "You can do it!"

"Yeah, especially since it's for the sake of your lovely princess, Cho Chang," smirked Ron. Hermione kicked him in the buttocks with her pointed shoe.

"Be careful Harry," said Hermione anxiously.

"Don't worry, I'll be fine," lied Harry. His heart was beating rapidly, and he felt an odd fluttering in his stomach. He suddenly wanted to vomit, but he managed to keep his breakfast down, and mounted his broom.

Harry flew over the enclosure, and surveyed the landscape. The dragon was sleeping on one side of the oblong structure, and it was curled around a straw nest containing three or four glittering golden eggs. Harry decided to simply dive down on his broom, scoop up an egg, and fly away as quickly as possible. However, a figure flying on a broom in the distance distracted him.

_Oh no,_ thought Harry, _it can't be Cedric!_

The figure zoomed closer toward Harry, and it revealed itself to be none other than…. Someone Harry didn't know!

The figure, a skinny man with a sullen face and bushy eyebrows stopped before him.

"Blabbady blah blah ooky gaboo fooodaa mmmmuuuchi igpiey mick mick mick mick," said the man.

"Er… excuse me?" said Harry.

"Oh, pardon me," replied the man, "But I vas vondering if you vere avter ze golden eggz as vell."

"Yeah," answered Harry to the foreigner. The man's surly face lightened a bit.

"Zen do you vant to accompany me to keel ze dragon and take ze eggs?"

"Kill the dragon?" gasped Harry, "But that dragon belongs to someone already! I was planning to just fly down, grab an egg, and fly away."

The foreigner mused over this a bit.

"Vell, zat zounds like a good idea. Pardon me, but vat is your name?"

"Harry Potter."

"I am Viktor, Viktor Krum."

"Nice to meet you."

"And you as vell." Viktor nodded gravely at Harry, "Shall ve do it?"

"Yeah," returned Harry determinedly.

"Vell zen, you can go first."

"Fine with me."

Harry began to descend, and gained speed as he plummeted. The wind whooshed through his ears, and the golden eggs began to grow larger as they came closer. Harry had eyes only for the golden eggs, when suddenly, one of them was snatched away from right before him!

"Wha--?" gasped Harry in surprise. He looked at the person holding the golden egg. "CEDRIC?"

"Shh…" hushed Sir Cedric, "Don't yell! The dragon just finally went to sleep! I've been crouching behind that rock over there waiting for _hours _for this moment!"

"Too late…" groaned Harry as the dragon gave a loud snort. It opened one of its bright yellow eyes, caught sight of the egg- thieves, and reared up with a huge roar. Fire burst from its nostrils, and it lunged toward the two.

"Well, since I've already gotten my egg, I better be going…." said Sir Cedric. With that, he flew away into the sun, his divine hair fluttering behind him in the wind and the golden egg glinting in his arms.

_That git,_ thought Harry angrily. He decided on a different plan of action, and mounted his broom. Harry flew up, and began to sway hypnotically before the dragon. The Horntail followed Harry with its gleaming yellow eyes, and whipped its burnished black tail back and forth threateningly. Harry flew in circles around its head to antagonize it further, and finally, the black magical reptile could no longer take Harry's blatant teasing. It launched itself into the air, and lurched at Harry, but was pulled back to the ground by the thick iron chain coiled around its ankle. Harry flew a little closer, and the Horntail surged at Harry once again. Harry took this chance, and plummeted to the nest where he scooped up a golden egg. The dragon was too large to change direction so quickly, and Harry had enough time to soar away with his hard-earned prize clutched firmly in his hands. He whooshed to where Ron, Hermione, and Charlie were standing with a triumphant grin on his face. As he landed, a mane of bushy brown hair suddenly attacked him.

"You did it!" squealed Hermione ecstatically, "You did it!" She nearly strangled him.

"Good job mate, I was watching. You were awesome!" congratulated Ron.

"I knew you could do it," said Charlie proudly.

Just then, Viktor Krum landed beside them. Harry had nearly forgotten about that bloke.

"I see you haf succeeded in your quest," stated Viktor.

"Yeah, yeah, I did," beamed Harry. His euphoria was making him feel dizzy and lightheaded. "Aren't you going to give it a go as well?"

"Vell—" began Viktor, but Charlie interrupted him.

"As a dragon trainer, I have to step in," declared Charlie, "That Horntail already has had enough eggs taken from her. I need to ensure that they hatch and grow because I am hoping to revive the Horntail population."

"Why would you do something crazy like that?" protested Ron in horror, "Imagine, little baby dragons growing up into more Horntails like that!"

"Still," continued Charlie, "It's a rare magical creature and it would be quite a pity if all of them disappeared from the world forever."

"He's right," said Hermione, "And not to mention that dragons have many uses, especially its blood, and its heartstrings are often utilized to make wands."

"Anyvay," cut in Viktor, getting tired of all the talk, "I cannot leave vithout a dragon egg, or I vill haf shamed my family. I cannot return to Bulgaria in such disgrace."

"Oh," said Harry, trying to sound sympathetic. However, he was still titillated by his close brush with death and his sense of accomplishment.

"What do you need it for?" asked Hermione with interest.

"Vell, it iz a very important ingredient in a potion that I am brewing for my sick muzzer," replied Sir Viktor, "Ze Healer said zat she cannot be healed vithout an egg from ze Hungarian Horntail."

"What sort of sickness does she have?" questioned Hermione.

"Vell, my muzzer, she has a disease much like ze one zat zis boy here has," said Krum, pointing at Ron, "Spots are growing on her face and she look more gruesome, very much like ze boy." Ron looked very offended at this, while Charlie snickered appreciatively.

"Oh! You mean spattergroit!" cried Hermione in recognition, "You don't need a dragon egg to heal that! You just have to take the liver of a toad, bind it tightly around your neck, and stand naked by the full moon in a barrel of eel's eyes!"

"Zoes zat veally vork?" inquired Sir Viktor doubtfully, "Vell zen, much obliged Lady… er… vat vas your name?"

"Oh yeah!" remembered Harry, "I forgot the introductions! Ron, Hermione, Charlie, this is Sir Viktor Krum!"

"Viktor Krum?" gasped Ron in amazement, "_THE_ Sir Viktor the Valorous, the Knight who can fly faster than a hippogriff? Sir Viktor who was the youngest winner of the Quidditch Battle Tournament by capturing the Snitch in less than three minutes? That Sir Viktor?"

"Yes," answered Sir Viktor the Valorous with a surly look at Ron. He turned backed to Hermione.

"I am much obliged, Lady Hermy-own-ninny, and I vish to zank you for your kindness. I am very grateful zat my mother has hope of being healed from ze disease that makes her look like zis boy here, and I vould like to take you back to Bulgaria vith me. Vill you, Lady Hermy-own-ninny, come back to my country vith me?"

"Wait, are you asking me to marry you?" gaped Hermione. Krum nodded his head. Her mouth hung open, and she looked at Krum like he had a unicorn growing from his toe. Harry, Ron, and Charlie gazed at Krum with stupefied looks. Suddenly, Ron began to guffaw.

"You're saying you want to get married with _her_?" snorted Ron with laughter. "That was a good one Viktor! You almost had me there!" Ron began to laugh boorishly, and he slapped his thighs. Then, he started to choke on his own spit. However, Hermione did not find it so funny. Harry noticed that tears were threatening to spill from her eyes as she glared at Ron doubled over amusement. Charlie noticed this as well.

"Stop laughing Ron," commanded Charlie, "Hermione is at a marriageable age, and it shouldn't be so surprising that a suitor should come seeking her hand."

"Yes, but why _her_?" howled Ron in merriment, "She doesn't even count as a _woman_!" A stunned silence (except for Ron gasping in amusement) followed this cutting comment. Hermione's hot tears spilled out of her eyes and into the ground.

"Ron, you disgusting, disgusting---" Hermione could not seem to find any words to express her anger, and she began to sob. She slapped Ron across the face, kicked him in the balls, and ran off into the woods with her broom over her shoulder. Ron fell to the ground in agony.

"What was up with _her_?" grimaced Ron, clutching his injured body part. Krum scowled at Ron, and looked surlier than ever.

"I vill go back home now, and heal my muzzer. Zen, I vill come back here and await Lady Hermy-own-ninny's reply," declared Sir Krum. Without another word, he smoothly mounted his broom and headed home.

"Wow, I can't believe Hermione actually got a marriage proposal," remarked Ron as the pain began to subside. Harry and Charlie did not reply, but instead looked at Ron with inscrutable expressions on their face. They turned away and began to walk in the direction that Hermione went.

"What?" cried Ron in befuddlement. He ran after the two. "What did I do wrong?"

**To Be Continued...**

* * *

I haven't updated in a while ;) Please Review! I really appreciate it! 


End file.
